I don't think I could fall asleep without praying. It's been a habit for as long as I can remember. Not even one memory of ending my day without at least saying a quick something to my Heavenly Father occurs. Not only that, but my morning's begin with a prayer. In addition, more often than not, I don't listen to music if I'm in my car alone--I like that chance it gives me to talk to my Father in Heaven.
With that being said, I have to be honest and say, sometimes I still feel disconnected. I feel like I'm talking to my walls instead of Him. Or maybe I'm talking, He's listening, but surely isn't understanding.
We're taught that good communication is the way to success and effectivity in life. Want your marriage to last? Learn how to communicate. Want to make friends? Learn how to communicate. Want to get backing on a business venture? Learn how to communicate your ideas.
Obviously we know that there is more to it than just speaking. Face the person who is speaking, give physical feedback, respond with related responses, maintain eye contact...you know the drill. So how interesting that the most important communication of our existence contains nothing more than us speaking or simply thinking. He hears us? He gets us?
As I was reading in my Book of Mormon this week I came across this particular scripture that redirected my thoughts. 2Nephi 32:3, "Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ, Wherefore I say unto you, feast upon the words of Christ; for behold the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do."
How can I doubt for one single minute that He hears me? My conversations, the feelings I get when I pray, and most of all the scriptures I read all are concrete evidence that He is not only listening to me, but responding. Coincidence that the week I'm asking Him about how to make my prayers more effective that I happen to read, "Ye must pray always and not faint." (2Ne. 32:9), or "And I know that the Lord God will consecrate my prayers for the gain of my people." (2Ne 32:4)? Not happenstance but His way of showing me that He knows what's on my mind and IS responding. Am I listening? Am I actively and genuinely communicating to Him? Am I making myself available to Him? Or the question that's touching my heart the most, am I allowing other people to act as my angels?
In my Patriarchal Blessing I am told, "You are indeed separated from your Heavenly Father on this earth, but only to an extent." it later continues, "...counsel with those around you, for they will never lead you astray." He knows that my heart longs to share the most direction and personal relationship with Him. Because that is not possible at this point in the eternal process He has sent me angels to look me in the eyes and say what I need to hear. He than confirms it with a feeling in my heart.
I know that He loves me. He loves you too. He is always listening, and He always cares. Look for the evidence. I think you'll be astounded.
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